straight from my heart

To all the adults who think they are GROWN UP.....but unfortunately they aren't

2011-01-24T03:33:00.000-08:00

Travelling everyday in local trains does teach you a lot.

The other day I was returning to office from a press conference in Churchgate. On my way back in the second class compartment which was comparatively less crowded than always, I suddenly heard a lady shouting at a small girl; abusing her, and pulling her by her hand inside the compartment. They were accompanied by another girl who seemed to be the little kid's elder sister. Well, none of them seemed to be from a non-educated background.

This loud chaos certainly attracted everyone's attention.

The lady after forcibly making the girl sit, alighted at the next stop. However, her abuses had not stopped yet. She came near the window and yelled ,"You better not get up from your seat. Or else I will hit you idiot." She also warned the co-passengers as well her sister to keep a watch at the kid until she gets down at her desired stop in Andheri.

By that time the kid was already into tears due to the physical and verbal humiliation especially in public. With head bent low, she sat still, staring at the floor with tears flowing down her cheeks.

Later as the train approached their station, the kid got up in excitement and started walking towards the door. The moment her elder sister saw her get up, she too pulled her forcibly, abusing in a similar way the lady did.

These were the two incidences I witnessed, out of the many which the kid must be facing daily due to her folks.

Adults generally have such kind of approach towards kids. They feel shouting and abusing would stop the kid from doing things at that very moment itself. But, behaving that way, they do not understand that it does threaten the kid temporarily but the permanent mark it leaves on the kids psyche and conduct is far more threatening.

Kids, I have noticed, are excited while travelling in train, astonishingly looking at the fast pacing world outside.

A common perception is that kids are immature, they do not have self respect and its totally fine treating them harshly in public, as people would understand that they are still kids with not as much maturity and intelligence.

Well what we dont understand is these sensitive minds of children do grasp a lot and are open to all kinds of behavior, experiences and situations. Anxious to try new things, get experiences out of those (good or bad), exploring the world they had never seen before, learning and more learning is what a kids brain starves for.

Shutting or stopping him/her from doing so not only brings down this anxiety to learn new things, gain new experiences, but also brings a major change (a negative one) in their conduct.

Moreover, imagine what terrible knock it would cause to their self respect. Why do adults always assume, self respect is what comes with age/education/occupation? Self respect is something that accompanies A Self since birth. From a one day old infant to a 80 year old individual, everyone expects and wants to be treated with respect. And a slap to one's respect during childhood, hampers further growth of the individual causing frequent insults to his/her respect. (this might not be the case always, but a large number of kids generally tend to get inclined towards the negative side after such experiences).

Kids should be treated as kids. Lowering down to their maturity and intelligence and explaining good and bad consequences of their behavior not only does mature a child but also retains his/her respect.

This quote from Stacia Tauscher is effective enough to explain my thought in one line

"We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today."

Back to Blogging

2011-01-23T22:36:00.001-08:00

Well.....long long time since I have blogged....totally caught up with work for the past one year.But will be posting my article soon....surely looking forward to permanent and regular updates of my thoughts on various issues.....

Thanks to my friends pestering me to start writing....your motivation and encouragement will be appreciated and valued.....

realisation deems through ones experiences.....

2008-05-31T23:28:00.000-07:00

A couple of months ago, I read a front page news story about a 20 year old boy who lost his life in a road accident. The man who was hit by him while crossing the road also underwent the same fate. This accident took place on the highway near to my locality. The point where the accident took place was famous amongst the localities for being an accident prone area. In order to avoid such severe accidents the political authorities had built a foot bridge on the highway.
So how did the accident take place?
The boy driving the bike didn’t see the man who was crossing the highway and as expected to be the speed of the bikes on a highway, he too was driving at approximately 80-90km/hour. The biker tried saving the man but he couldn’t control the speed of the bike and hit him,… further losing his control on the bike and dashing over a light pole. The biker broke his leg and his face was smashed by the impact with which he hit the pole. Traffic police were present at a distance of a km from the spot and there was a traffic police station at the same distance. The two victims were alive but in need of an emergency aid.
Now here comes the tragedy….
A cop reached the spot on his bike but he didn’t have a vehicle to carry both the wounded to the hospital.. Strange isn’t it…when you know there are two people severely injured and you need to rush them to the hospital, the cop must have got his jeep with him. Instead the cop tried stopping vehicles on the highway for help. But unfortunately the driver’s were interested in knowing only the reason and the details of the accident, than, in carrying the casualties to the hospital. As soon as they were content with the story they would drive away caring a damn about the two men struggling for life. People didn’t even care to respect the cop as an “Authority” who was doing his duty and as a matter of concern cooperate or at least respond to the terror of a cop ordering them to take the victims to the hospitals. Fearing to be involved by the police in the accident case, the drivers did not help the victims. The cop struggled for almost an hour, by which time the biker succumbed to his injuries. The other victim was still struggling for his life. Finally, a rickshaw driver agreed to carry the victim to the hospital. However, he too died due to excessive blood loss which was due to the delay in admitting him to the hospital.
Now who is supposed to be blamed here?
The cop, the biker, the man who found an easy way to cross the road instead of the foot bridge, the drivers who cared a damn about the victims or the law?
Well…I would say each is, to some extent involved in this incident. However, instead of the blame game. Let this incident be taken as an example to be learnt.
For the cops: to make things available as per the situation and not involve innocent people in the cases .
For us: to abide by the laws. i.e., to use the foot bridge rather than crossing highways and the passer-by’s to please help victims when in need. Forget laws and do remember HUMANITY...
For the authorities: to please propagate the correct laws amongst the citizens. (as the law says: people who admit accident victims in the hospital cannot be involved in the case.)
For the biker: Teenagers, if you don’t have control over your driving please do not drive fast. I understand…some people do like speed and adventure but not at the cost of other’s life. Who knows the man who lost his life might be the sole bread winner of his family.

P.S: the biker was a friend of mine and we all still feel bad, not being there to help him when he was in utmost need. Have to say…u understand the impact of such situations only when someone close to you is involved.

Unfortunate experiences.....bitter memories.....!!!!!

2008-05-04T12:12:00.000-07:00

I was waiting at the station for my train to Mumbai. Since it was afternoon, the station was comparatively less crowded. I sat on an empty bench on the platform where my compartment was expected to halt. A group of guys-aged 13-18, expected to be hailing from not so well to do families were loitering around on the station. They stopped a few feet ahead of me.

As expected, the guys started off a discussion, each arguing on their bravery to molest/eve tease girls. The guys were discussing on how many gals they succeeded to molest/tease and to what extent had they tried to get physical with them. Every guy interrupted the other guy by saying…. “That’s it…that’s what you tried to do….come on…listen to my stunt and you would be flabbergasted”.
I heard many of their conversations which cannot be mentioned in details here, but believe me those incidents were really horrifying and I deeply pity the gals involved in it.

I still dared to sit on the bench, trying to avoid their gazes and hoping I would not be a part of their so called bravery. But, I was so wrong and how could I underestimate all of them. The guys slowly, (I guess it was a planned move), came near my bench and finally two of them sat besides me. This time I finally decided to get up and move. As soon as I got up one of those guys passed a lewd comment and snapped the other guy saying…. “See coz of you madam had to leave”….
Fortunately, I didn’t face much of embarrassment after that. I couldn’t act much or react rebelliously as they were 6 of them and I was comparatively on the weaker side to revolt back or give a bashing. A single person cant teach a group of men a lesson….come on I should have been a hindi film heroine to do so!!!!! And yeah.....here i did come across guys from the lower strata of the society but well educated,sophisticated men too commit such heinous crime..class and caste doesnt play much of a part here but the psychology of men does....

But on a serious note…. As the great thinker Weber’s Verstehen approach states….analyse things from the opposite person’s point of view….I suggest all the readers (especially GUYS) to think of the above experience from the gals point of view.
We hear many cases of girls being molested at railway stations, on the roads, bus stops etc….be it a private or a public place, every girl must have experienced this, to some extent. Imagine yourself being touched awkwardly in front of several people without your own will and without the freedom or the strength to retort back as per your wishes. I mentioned freedom and strength here because I don’t mean to say girls are weak( infact I will never say that) but certain circumstances are such that the girl has to stay calm and get herself harassed. Many might say…..come on that isn’t the case….but being a girl I have come across many girls who have shared such an experience be they thin or fat/ young or old enough to rebel.

Moreover, how badly shattered the girl feels when she goes through such an incident. The person molesting a girl does it for his satisfaction be it physical or mental and forgets the next moment, but the victim has to carry it on the whole life (and I really MEAN this statement.). Even a small incident keeps haunting the whole life giving a troubled feeling. The uneasy sensation of being touched by a stranger, as if being a public property with people around you just watching the incident and either laughing at the plight of the gal or showing fake empathy towards her.
The other day I heard a programme on the radio regarding the eve teasing issue, wherein men were asked to call and give their view points on the same (amazing concept here-guys being asked to participate on such a topic). One of the callers who was a frequent traveller on the Mumbai locals shared his story of being molested by a gay in the train. His statement was “ after that bad experience I really started respecting girls that even after being molested they tend to forget the bygones. This incident took place months ago but I still feel uneasy when I recall the experience. The situation was such that I couldn’t do much against the molestor….."

Guys, many such incidents might come to your mind after reading this article, either the ones you experienced or witnessed. Please give it a thought and try and act constructively whenever you come across such an incident….

SPECIAL DAYS.....WORTHLESS ACTS.....

2008-03-08T22:25:00.000-08:00

HAPPY WOMEN’S DAY!!!!!
Now that’s what every Tom,Dick and Harry and every Seeta,Geeta and Meeta whom I happened to meet on the 8th of March wished me.
And the next question to follow was how you celebrated your special day? Well, I was a bit confused or say blank about the answer. What should I answer? Should I give them those page 3 kinda answers….means...I went shopping, gossiping, partying whole day with my female pals or should I say the truth….that it was a very normal day spent doing routine day stuff. I preferred the later statement and to my obvious expectation the reaction was….Don’t tell me. You didn’t do anything special today? Come on lady….it is your day today. Get going!!!!
Well, so much of coaxing didn’t change my mind nor was I tempted to spend the remaining hours doing what I should ideally be doing according to my so called well wishers.

However, it did raise a thought in my mind about the people’s perspective about these numerous days which they keep celebrating enthusiastically.
One such day is the great controversial Valentine’s Day. Every year couples wait eagerly for this blessed day when they can express their seamless love to each other. Flowers, greetings, heart shaped balloons are visible everywhere you go. How can I forget “Red”- the colour of the day!!! (I bet the other colours would be getting jealous of Red for stealing the show. pun intended….) every other galli,nukka(here comes my hindi again….)was filled with couples with varying degrees of PDA(public display of affection) and with guys portraying every single sign of being a Romeo trying to impress some or the other Juliet. The loners are left sighing deeply for being left alone in this mean, cruel world. Infact, looking at those cozy couples must have definitely added to their depression and the want to have a partner to depend on (or should I say to show to the world that I too have a gf/bf and I too am of the Yo!!! Types..) Well, I don’t understand why do you need to anxiously, curiously wait for a single day to express your feelings when nature has provided 365 days to do so? Come on….spending thousands of bucks( surprisingly a single red rose which costs Rs.2-5/- on a normal day is sold for Rs.25-50/- on the Special occasion of LOVE) on a single day just to follow the trend is a mere waste of money, energy and your fast moving precious time. However, here the gift shop owners, flower vendors will completely resist and oppose my statement. And why won’t they? Am I not pessimistically interfering in their business? Don’t forget it’s not just the couple’s day out but their day too, when they can earn almost double or triple the amount they make the whole week.
Come on people, be rationalistic and think of expending money on something worth spending on, which will give satisfaction to both the payer as well as the receiver.

Now comes the Women’s day.. Whole day I saw a news channel broadcasting the silver screen’s saas and bahu’s showing of their revealing dresses, partying and dancing and expressing fake views on women empowerment and things they were hardly aware and concerned of. They were in such a wild mood as if it was the only day they could get to get wild. Rich women, be it from the business class or the celebrity class were felicitated for their achievements. None gave it a thought to think about the thousands of women suffering form domestic abuses, dowry abuses, eve teasing etc everyday. Why cant this day be treated a special day to make people aware of these abuses and their growing proportion. Women who have fought against such cruelty and such criminal domination in their real life without any helping hand and favorable circumstances should be awarded with. This will help creating a respectful position of women on their male counterpart leading to at least a decrease in the abuses…
Well, it ofcourse is a subjective topic but it’s an idea worth giving a thought on. So go ahead, think about it and act on it whenever possible..

speeding up for nowhere......!!!!!

2008-01-23T04:58:00.000-08:00

We humans have a major issue of rushing where ever we go. We want to be the first. And inorder to get into that numero uno position we break rules,laws,fight and do what ever illegal/illegitimate/crazy/witty..(wateva u say:)......possible.

I was travelling from Mumbai to Pune today..and at every toll naka inspite of the single long queue of cars, I could see a bunch of cars(almost three in parallel in a lane), at the end of the naka where you pay the toll, all trying their level best to get into the line first. In this fight, which was also a ego clash between the drivers (all thinking lets see how the other gets ahead of me) honking, giving each other silly hull bajis[bambaiyya hindi ;)] became a part.. Ofcourse, the huge engines did succeed in dominating the small ones, but then the major question which came into my mind is....WHERE AND WHY ARE ALL THIS GUYS RUSHING TO? They were in such a hurry that it appeared as if; if they don't get to pass the toll naka first, the earth below would open up wide and gulp all the remaining cars[well a crazy thought sitting in the car waiting for my turn to pay the holy toll :P]

My family decided to visit a Ganesha temple on our way to Pune. As compared to the otherwise long queues on Tuesday's, we were surprised to see the short line heading towards the temple. I stood in the line and was proceeding towards the Pravesh Dwar(the door). As soon as I reached a few feet before the Dwar I saw people ahead of me charging (I should say shoving each other desperately ) all of a sudden. I looked back at my mom with confusion, asking what happend all of a sudden.[Thought may be a terrorist attack out of nowhere/ or some thief stealing something or the other from the temple ;)] But, when I looked back at them did I realise this was the hurry and strife for the darshan..:D

Well these were two instances I witnessed during the trip.
We people are always in a hurry....be it performing our regular everyday tasks, or going out for a vacation....reaching a place as early as possible(even if one is on a vacation), impatient to receive the order placed in a restaurant etc....we are always striving to be the first in doing anything..
Technology and easy/ fast service has made us lose our patience, mental stability..Urbanities are so very busy in their so called fast life that it becomes difficult to wait in a queue for our turn to come or sit back/relax and patiently wait for a service to be provided. It becomes hard to digest any obstruction or delay in achieving our goals...be it the minutest daily chores like any connection error in our mobile service to the pizza not getting delivered in half an hour;)(vague but valid examples :D)
The most popular and most influential word of the 21st century is FAST......

2008-01-20T04:42:00.000-08:00

So..here I am finishing off a task my friend asked me to complete long long back......I was the first person to be tagged in his friends list...n guess and hope too, that I ain't the last to finish it off....;)

well....its a difficult task to write something about urself....when you write something about urself.....the general reaction of people who read it is.....either this chic is over-confident or under-confident of herself......isko dekh ke aisa lagta nahin that she is in reality what she has written....guess time for her to know her true self.....;)(pun intended)

well.......too much of this funda now.......time to get back to action.....

1) well.....to start off ..I am a complete foodie.I just love all kinda cuisines.....give me any dish and you will see a look of heavenly satisfaction on my face..I just lovee watching cookery shows on Tv..just admire the way the chef's cook(not look ;)), imagine the smell and the taste of the food..:)and somewhere deep in the heart, wish, if by any chance the food comes out of the TV set and I get to gobble it down....:D
Food makes me so crazy that sometimes I wish I get married to a chef..;).....

2)I don't show it much often....but I am very much possessive about my pals and loveeee them v mch......love spending time with them....any time of the day/night I would happily go and hangout with them at our favourite addas......

3)As my blogs indicate, i am a complete animal lover and have a soft/weak(wateva u say) corner for old people. Just dislike the people who misbehave with them..Plan to open up old age homes in future...n homes for the four-legged too....:D Thats my biggest dream........

4)I am a lazy person....infact to be precise....sleep for rest of the time and as the D-day arrives hurry up getting and making everyone around me tensed....I am of those wake up-at the last moment types.....Lack self motivation and hence need someone to motivate me on a regular basis....

I often end up motivating others by my hard core-reality talks .... heard from many close mates that I am a good counsellor....:D

5) Am a complete dance and music lover.....neva got to learn these professionally but yeah aspire to make my kids dancer and singer......;)

6) I love stuffs like tarot reading, palmistry.......one could say those witchy things.....;)

7) For the conclusive part, Me a perfect Aquarian in all terms....:D

Time to tag my friends.......here goes the list.....
suren,rajeshwari,ronny........

transition !!!!!

2008-01-04T08:31:00.000-08:00

Heard about the recent molestation case near hotel J W Marriot, Mumbai. Two NRI couples were walking outside the hotel when a group of men passed lewd comments on the girls. When one of the girls questioned the gang they were surrounded by the whole group and molested to the extent of ripping their clothes off. Media persons present there clicked pictures of the whole incident and there it was, ‘the breaking news of the day’!!!! Then came suggestions, comments, views, opinions ….. of people from all over the nation some blaming the girls, the gang while some holding responsible the cops and the overall security system. Mumbai was charged to be going the Delhi way.
Apart from the blame game, and the so called solutions on the safety measures to be implemented lets view the issue from this perspective. Right now our country is undergoing a transition. It is slowly proceeding towards the state of modernization. However, Indians have assumed the wrong meaning of the term modernization. Many even tend to confuse between modernization and westernization. Modernization means process which involves industrialization, urbanization and other social changes basically involving development of both the society as well as the individual, keeping the culture and the traditions of the society intact. Of course, that doesn’t mean being static and adhering to the old traditions which have given way long back and not changing with the changing times. Moreover, our country has altered for the good, eliminating many evils like sati, child marriage etc. But still the mindset of the individuals has not changed to a larger extent. People have become modern, mostly, in their outer appearance, the things they use, the infrastructure etc.but they still are traditional in their mind.
In the urge to become modern, Indians are running behind the westernization influence. Adopting western culture, tradition, values, manners etc is what Indians are more interested in. A person’s class, his position in society is generally decided by how western his way of living is. A person is said to be educated and sophisticated by the branded formals and blazers he wears, when he eats with a knife or a fork instead of his hands, when he uses an imported Merc or a Rolls Royce instead of an Indian Fiat or a Maruti.
Now the point is, how this is related to the issue I have put forth…..
Well, every development that takes place, takes time to reach the zenith. Modernization doesn’t take place suddenly. Deviations do take place during these transitions. Deviations in the behavior of the people involved, in the process of reaching the goal etc. Generations are involved before the whole society becomes modern both mentally and physically. Deviation in this process is the misinterpreting of the two terms modernization and westernization. And that is what is happening. Girls are taking over the western style of dressing and conducting themselves in society. Wearing mini skirts, revealing tops, boozing, getting into unsolicited activities etc under the banner of being modern is a trend today. It becomes hard to digest for the hard core culture inclined people. Moreover, people migrating from rural areas to cities find it hard to digest this culture shock. Well one might very well say that it is their problem. But then thinking objectively, we have to survive in this society and have to adjust according to the mindset of the members of this social system. A male dominated society cannot change the other way round all of a sudden. Ofcourse, women should get their bit and freedom but then progress in this direction should be slowly and steadily. All of a sudden behaving so freely in the society, competing physically with the men etc would lead to such incidents. Ours is a generation facing the transition and it is we who have to struggle to shape the society as per our needs and desires. Society would face such major issues before it reaches a final stage where women would be able to roam around freely, behave in somewhat similar manner as men. That might be the generation of our kids where it would be a cakewalk for them. Youngsters today think at a different line from what their parents think and this brings about a gap in the thinking level of the two generations- the generation gap. May be tomorrow a society might come wherein our ideas might match with the future generations but as obvious this will take time and generations too..

2007-12-18T00:57:00.000-08:00

writing a blog after a longgggggggg time........
but will surely try to keep posting.....:D

as for now here's one that I had to write on ........

A few days ago I read in the newspaper that 8 dogs were burnt alive under the pretext of being rabid and hence a threat to the people staying in the nearby areas. An investigation later proved that none of the dogs suffered from the disease and were burnt by the residents to get rid of the havoc they created in the society. Their half burnt bodies where left in the open to rot.
I have heard, read , seen many such cases wherein animals are stoned to death, poisoned, caged without providing food and water, sacrificed etc. These issues are given least priority amongst the other serious ones and are hardly read, thought and acted upon. Just imagine yourself in their positions while reading the blog further and give a thought to the whole issue.
Animals are skinned alive in leather industries…imagine their plight, the tears rolling down their eyes, the moaning…. Y? So that a few fashion conscious, trendy individuals boast around those leather accessories pompously. Ever thought, is it a necessity to use leather articles? Is their absence going to prove a deficit to us in any kind? Well, that is for the readers to analyze and answer.
Goats, calves, pigs are locked up in the dark in tiny cages which are not even fit to their size. Due to the size of the cages the animal can neither sit or stand without being able to move around or shift its position. They are kept in such a vilest position for months. And why is that done? So that they there meat colour changes due to lack of movement and absence of exposure to sunlight. Colour of the meat is changed as it is a growing demand by the health conscious people. But imagine just for the demand of a few diet conscious individuals why is an animal tortured for months together.
Cock fighting, bull fighting are some games which have been banned but still being played in some part of the countries. In order to make them ready for the games the animals are caged in the dark for months unexposed to light. Due to this when they are released in the light after such a long period they go wild and become aggressive.
In many butcher shops, section of an animal’s body is sliced without killing it completely in order to prove to the customers that the meat is fresh. Then the animal is left out to suffer in the pain for hours before it is finally slaughtered.
Stray dogs are stoned or beaten by iron, wooden sticks to death. Citizens whine about the nuisance and the harm they cause to them. But hardly any one thinks about the reason of the growth in their population. Authorities concerned with the sterilization and the vaccination of the animal hardly take timely steps. Why for the lazy attitude of the authorities the animal be tortured and murdered? Thinking in detail about it. Why do we have to blame the authorities alone for this. Can't the citizens take steps themselves. Passing on the blame on each other has always proved to be convienient. As the newspapers suggest, every building can adopt atleast two dogs and take complete care of them.
Moreover there are other sophisticated ways to put the animal to sleep than to knocking it off so ruthlessly.
Animals are abused for pleasure, food or experimenting. These are just a few or not even 10% of the issues on animal abuse that I have touched upon. Try considering the above issues and reading more about the topic. Visit a few sites and check out the videos because watching cruelty videos proves to be more effective and touching than reading them.

just thought of putting down some famous quotes which i liked the most :)

God loved the birds and invented trees. Man loved the birds and invented cages. ~Jacques Deval

We have enslaved the rest of the animal creation, and have treated our distant cousins in fur and feathers so badly that beyond doubt, if they were able to formulate a religion, they would depict the Devil in human form. ~William Ralph Inge,

Think occasionally of the suffering of which you spare yourself the sight. ~Albert Schweitzer

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game. ~Paul Rodriguez
I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her. ~Ellen DeGeneres

If you love animals called pets, why do you eat animals called dinner? ~As seen on a shirt at veganstore.com

The Mistreated Silvers.

2006-12-10T05:37:00.000-08:00

“Life is like a dogsled team…. Unless you are the lead dog, the scenery never changes”. Someone has rightly said this. As long as a person in physically and financially fit to lead himself and his folks, he has respect and dignity. However, as soon as he becomes useless in doing so, the scene changes completely and he becomes the worthless part of the family.
89-year-old Ram Pradhan sits in a corner of his flat and silently, slowly chops vegetables under the observant eye of his daughter in law. What has become his daily routine now; he takes an agonizing 30 minutes to do so and another 15 minutes to walk back to the kitchen. He suffers from elephantiasis, while his wife is partially blind.
Hardly does any one know about such harassment done to the elderly within the four walls of the house on a regular basis. At present this exploitation is been done on a huge scale which is termed as Elder Abuse. Elder abuse is defined as a single or a repeated act or lack of appropriate action occurring within a relationship where there is an expectation of trust. This may result in physical harm and mental distress leading to harmful conditions of living and endangering the elder persons safety. Physical harm can be slapping, beating, pushing, burning, pulling hair or forced confinement. Mental torture can be humiliation, insult and black mail.
There are severe cases of elder abuse where children harass their sick and old parents to give them their property or savings. Moreover, we often get to hear cases about daughter-in-law’s getting tortured by her in-laws. There is a law intended to protect daughter-in-law against such torture, which on one side is good. However, people fail to look at the other side of the coin i.e., the misuse of this law by the daughter-in-law against her in-laws. Often the daughter-in-law files wrong complaints against her in-laws to get rid of their illness and burden. There are many cases where the aged commit suicide after being sued and jailed wrongly. This phenomenon is on a rise due to increase in nuclear family culture. Children want to live alone, on which the aged disagree and hence the children find such ways to kick them away from their houses.
Elder abuse has been going on since a long time but barely anyone considers it or takes action against it. Sometimes even the aged or the children themselves are unaware of such things happening around them. Senior citizens do not report such crimes, because they feel humiliated, ashamed or feel that they might be put in some old age home far away from their children. Sometimes under the pretext of loving their children and not being able to register case against them, the aged become victims of such abuse.

Another dilemma faced by the senior citizens in urban area is of the insurance policies. Some of the public sector health insurers announced hiked premium for senior citizens this year. 70+ citizens (who want to buy a policy) will have to pay over Rs. 13,000/- per year for a cover of Rs.2 lakhs against the earlier of Rs. 7000/-.
“How we are supposed to pay such a huge amount when we have retired in modest pensions, says Mrs. Ahluwalia”.
At present, the companies are also reducing the commission paid to the agents for insuring the elders. Only 10% is paid to the agents for insuring people between the ages of 45-55 years. Moreover, they have stopped paying agents their charge for insuring people above the age of 55. Earlier, the agents used to get 15% of the commission for the same. This makes the agent disinterested in helping the aged.
Moreover, according to the rules and regulations of many organizations, purchasing a policy after the age of 50 is the most difficult. Generally, the companies do not entertain people beyond 50 years of age because of the less profits they get by doing so. Moreover because of stringent procedures and red tapism renewal of the policies also becomes a tiresome job.

Another major issue the aged living in urban areas have to tackle is lack of security and protection. With children migrating to cities and abroad, the elderly are forced to stay alone. The concept of joint family has declined slowly making the elders to stay by themselves. Moreover, in today’s fast moving world where people are busy 24/7, they hardly get time to talk to neighbors or talk to people staying nearby. “I am staying in this apartment for the last 5 years but hardly do I know the names of people staying in the same floor where I stay. I work in the night and in the day time am busy finishing off other pending works, which gives me no time to talk to my neighbors, says Mr. Majumdar, a call-center employee staying in Thane.”
Elders staying unaccompanied now depend on electrical gadgets like video door phones, alarms and intrusion detectors. Moreover, being all by themselves they crave for attention, love and care. Sometimes the servants and house cleaners show this care, which might prove to be risky. Even if they do not allow strangers to come inside their house, they tend to forget that they are risking their life at the hands of their house cleaners whom they trust so much. Out of the eight cases of murder of senior citizens in Mumbai in 2005, five were committed by servants or people known to them. Even after repeated request by the police officers to register the identity of the servants’, people forget to do the same and then land into dilemma.
The number of 60+ people in 1947 was 19 million and at present, it is 80 million.
In the next two decades, it is expected to touch 137 million, due to rising life expectancy. With such rapid increase in the population, the problems are also anticipated to increase. Hence, proper steps and precautions taken now can lead to better and secure environment for the old people to live. Moreover, the children should think twice before mistreating their elders because they themselves are going to be old one day. As it is rightly said by an English writer- Compton Burnett-Dame Ivy, “Don’t be too hard on your parents, you may find yourself in their place.”

2006-12-02T04:17:00.001-08:00

Whole of Maharashtra was taken aback in the last 2 days. The reason being the desecration of Babasaheb Ambedkar’s statue in Kanpur. Dalits angered by such a behavior towards their beloved Neta could not control their anger and destroyed everything that came in their way. Be it private cars, public transport, or shops, everything was burnt or broken.
A few months back another famous politician’s wife’s statue was vandalized in Mumbai. Protests and agitations started and the whole city saw violent eruptions against the act for a few days.
Was this amount of destruction really necessary? Every time there is a caste or a political party or a celebrity involved in such an issue the common man is the one who suffers the most.
Indians are thought to be emotional. However, this negative outcome of emotions is immoral. Why is it that, when something wrong is done to the ones who are dead, do the people wake up from their sleep and agitate or display such immature acts of respect towards their deceased leaders? Hardly any of those departed are remembered by those activists in their everyday life. Barely do these politicians follow the philosophy or teaching of the ones whom they idolize. Moreover the statues once built are never cleaned.
Moreover, why is that the common man has to suffer in this whole issue. Vehicles are burnt, shops are broken. The recent issue almost charged the government with 12 crores. In addition, those 12 crores was the loss estimated only by the railways. Public transport like buses, rickshaws etc may increase the amount to some more crores.
Moreover, this amount is expected to be paid from our pockets only. Imagine, we paying money for the crime that we have not done.
Moreover, such threatening and violent acts can further lead to a sense of panic in the citizens. Such riots have caused a terror in the localities. Rumors and gossips further worsen the whole situation. Attacking people is such a childish act which is least expected from the people who are elected to protect them and not to harass them.
Statues should be removed. If you have respect for a person, better remember him and respect him. Building statues in their memory is fine, but the organization or the members who build those should take the authority to take care of them. Why has the government to be blamed for such issues? Government has a lot to look after, may be it is not doing its job efficiently, but they should not be blamed for such matters. Moreover in the recent case the governmental organization in the area where the statue was vandalized immediately replaced the severed one with another for a temporary basis. The government did so to avoid the violent reaction of the people. What else is the government expected to do in such a small period.
The government should of course take steps by making the persons who build these statues sign on a written document stating that they would take care of the statues. Due to this the people will come under a law and would surely take care of the statues. Alternatively, a law can be passed on the same. Moreover using technology the statues can be built in such a way that if any one touches them they get a diminutive amount of shock. The shock wont cause any injury but would certainly avoid a person from misbehaving with it.

2006-11-03T03:19:00.000-08:00

I had always dreamt of myself visiting a foreign country. It was always amazing to see how people outside our country live, their culture, the different types of food they eat, their dressing style, their looks and personality. I always used to watch them on TV and was amazed by their way of living.
Looking at my family units’ circumstance, I knew I would hardly get a chance to go abroad, unless and until I become independent. My elder brother was the first person in our family to go the United Kingdom for further studies. I was so excited about him going abroad, that I used to call him everyday and ask him inane questions on the way of life there. I used to ask him to send me pictures of places where he traveled there and preserved them as something very valuable.
Startlingly, at my 21st birthday, I got the most precious gift from my parents, an air ticket to London. Moreover, my best friend was to travel with me. I was to stay for a month in London. The feeling that I underwent then could not be expressed in words. It was, as one feels when ones most desired dream turns out to be true, excitement, happiness, ecstasy and what not.
I had to fly the next morning. My friend and I, going to London to visit my brother was the biggest surprise to me. I packed my bags and went to sleep, as I had to get up early in the morning to set off for the airport. I put on the alarm, but I knew, it would be of no use and it would be inane of me expecting sleep tonight. The whole night I kept thinking about how my vacation would go, the places I would visit etc. The whole night went shifting from one position to another, dreaming and waiting for my eyes to shut down and get some good sleep. Usually, I lazy down on my bed even if the alarm goes off and curse the alarm for ringing so early. However, today, I was cursing the alarm for not ringing, as I was growing impatient with every tick of the clock. At last losing out my patience, I got up one hour before the alarm was set. Where it usually takes me more than an hour to get ready, today, astonishingly I was ready in less than 30 minutes.
I had my breakfast, listening to my parents’ instructions on the airport rules and regulations I need to follow and how to behave in the foreign land. I do not remember how many instructions were registered in my brain as I was busy daydreaming about my forth-coming vacation. I hurriedly finished off my breakfast and got ready. After an half an hour eager wait I and my family got into the car and set off for our journey towards the airport. We were supposed to go along with my friend’s family. We stopped at her place, waiting for them to come along with us. All of us then set off for the airport.
The drive towards the airport was spent checking and rechecking the passports and other necessary things. We got down at the airport, loaded our baggage on the trolleys. There was still an hour left for our security check. My friend and I were busy discussing the things we would do there. Our parents were busy expressing their worries to each other, as it was the first time we were going on a trip outside the country and that to on our own. After an hour, our security check was announced. We proceeded for the check bidding our families goodbye. Done with our security and immigration we went to the waiting room. We eagerly waited for the authorities to call out for boarding the flight. Every announcement made sent gusto in our body. We were very happy for our first tour abroad. In addition, for me it was more exciting as I was going to experience the fun with one of the closest person in my life next to my family. At last, our boarding was announced and we headed towards the gate. We were greeted by the crewmembers and were directed to our respective seats. We took in our seat, fastened our seat belts and the next moment resumed our discussions. I could feel my heart beating fast in excitement. I was just 8 hours far from the most memorable moment of my life.
I was confused about what I was feeling at that moment. I felt like shouting aloud about the unforgettable moment I was going to experience. I felt like telling about my dream coming true to every person on the flight.
However, my friend and I indulged ourselves into a movie, which was being played on the monitor in front of out seats. I was hardly listening to the dialogues as I was busy making an imaginary lists in my brain computer about the things I would do so that I could not miss anything important.
After a few hours, my friend and I went to sleep. We got up on listening to the announcement made by the flight crew about the plane, which was going to land within 30 minutes. As soon as I heard the announcement, I almost got up from my seat in thrill. My friend pulled me down and I again fastened my seat belts and opened my window cover up to take a glimpse of the aerial view of my dream destination. I looked at every thing I could from the small window of the flight, so that I do not miss anything.
Our flight landed in Heathrow airport. I got out of the flight, and here I was seeing the dream, which I used to see with closed eyes turn into a reality. This was the most exciting experience of my life. Of course, the whole vacation was exciting and memorable, but the moment when I landed on the airport and took the first glance of a foreign country was the best moment of my life.

2006-10-30T23:22:00.000-08:00

We Indians are so familiar with corruption that, nowadays, it does not surprise us even if any huge amount of corruption case is exposed. Every Indian is now habituated to it and very well knows that any work to be done needs a fair amount of money.
Eleven MPs were caught on camera for the ‘cash on question’ scandal. Another half a dozen were exposed while asking commission for the MP Local Area Development Scheme. We are quite used to bureaucrats demanding bribe but this madness has not even spared the judiciary. A former Chief Justice of India recently admitted that at least 20% of the higher judiciary is corrupt. This has proved that, be it judiciary, executive, legislative, every section of our constitution is addicted to this iniquity.
We cannot term that India alone or other developing/underdeveloped countries, which lag behind economically, are corrupt. The truth is corruption is a global phenomenon. Corruption has laid its hands on developed countries too. The major cause of corruption is ‘Greed’, the greed of humans to be rich and successful by easy ways avoiding hard work. In addition, when it is coupled up with poor conviction rate in any nation the fear of punishment vanishes and corruption flourishes. Developed countries like USA, UK etc are very well corrupt.
However, what makes India different from the other countries? In India, even official and routine work, which is very well within the limits of the judiciary, requires extra money. Employees working in any government based organizations, be it from a ‘D’ class employee to an ‘A’ class officer has to be bribed for the completion of work. Hardly any one in India fears the law. However, in the Western world, for getting a work done that is well within the framework of law does not require bribe. The work is done routinely. However, illegal work does require that extra money in western world too.
This points the major difference and that is, be it legal or illegal; in India no work is done without bribing the authority. For instance, the cash on question scandal, the MP’s were caught on camera for taking money to ask questions in the parliament. To ask questions in the parliament is very well the duty of an MP, which is to be done in the Question Hour. Moreover, requesting an MP to ask questions is a legal thing. However, by taking bribe, these politicians have proved the extent to which our government has descended.
However, the ministers alone cannot be blamed in this whole matter. Indian citizens, themselves, have accepted the fact that no work can be done without bribe. They have accepted corruption on a day-to-day basis. However, if the citizens become aware of the particular laws, a lot of difference can be made. Knowing the necessary details, as to the numbers or other details of the anti corruption bureau, at least a few corrupt officers can be put behind bars. Moreover, elections can also be the best weapon to fight against corruption. Citizens should stop electing corrupt politicians. Many times, we overlook the character of the politician to the work he has done. However, that should be prevented because; whatever work the politician must have done, a corrupt politician is always a criminal.
Moreover, the political head of our country should also take some initiative in putting an end to this practice. India has such taught politicians, which lead the country and represent it globally. These people should make strict laws, while appointing senior level officers, which in turn appoint the other lower level officers. Following stern rules and regulations from the senior levels will automatically bring about discipline and orderliness in the subordinate levels.
India has brought the Right to Information Act into action. This can also prove to be a tool to minimize corruption. However, barring a few thousands of the population, hardly any one knows about the Act and its advantages. Hence, it is the responsibility of the governments and NGOs to educate people about it. Moreover, the citizens should also come forward, get themselves educated about the Act and their rights, and bring them into application wherever necessary.
Technology also has a lot of potential. Modern technologies and information can also reduce the evil and end this long run practice. After all, it is the secret cameras that helped in bringing into light the corrupt practices of the MPs in the cash on question case.

Changing Attitude.

2006-10-11T20:53:00.000-07:00

As usual, I was waiting at the station to catch a CST local to reach to my college. I missed my regular train and so with a aggravated look on my face, I was waiting for the next train to arrive. I went to the wheeler, bought a newspaper and started going through the headlines. After a 5 minutes wait, my train finally arrived at the station. I boarded it and sat near the window seat, and went back to my half-read newspaper.
Suddenly I heard a feeble voice calling me didi. I turned around in amazement to see a 5-6 year old boy, shabbily dressed, with his right palm stretching towards me, asking me to give him a penny. I looked at him for a few seconds and something about him fascinated me that I started conversing with him. I asked him the reason why he was begging. He said, ‘He was the only son in his family with four sisters and his father used to drink every night and beat his mother. His mother was a laborer in a construction site where she used to work on a temporary basis. So, he had to provide some financial help to his mother and that could be done only by begging.’ I gave him a penny and got up to get down at my station. I got down with a grave feeling in my heart, thinking about the poor kid, who at this tender age of joining school and playing around with kids of his age, had to beg and support his family financially.
The next day I had to catch the same train and I met the same kid again. We started conversing. This time the talk lasted for a long time. I found a smile on his face while he was talking hence I curiously asked him the reason why he was happy. He told me that a person was going to lend him some money and from that money, he was going to start selling litchi in the train. He was happy with the work he was going to do as he had to stop begging after he starts selling litchi. I encouraged him to do so but also advised him to study.
For a few days, I did not meet the boy as I could not board the same train.
After a few days, I saw the same kid on the platform with a basket full of litchi. I walked up to him and bought some litchis from him. Along with the litchi, he gave me a packet of bindis. I was stunned and asked him the reason for giving me a bindi packet. He said, girls look good in bindis and that he addresses me as didi so he would love to see me wearing a bindi. I was astonished and touched by the boy’s gesture. Such a small kid showing such maturity flabbergasted me.
I told some of my friends about the whole incident but they kind of ridiculed me and advised me not to talk to beggars as according to them they are wicked and awful people. And, that higher-class people like us should not talk to such people and lower our standards.
However, for me, such a small incident changed my whole perspective of looking towards people. A shabby looking kid, who had never attained school, had so much respect for his elders. In a society like ours, we discriminate people according to their financial status and their way of living. People are respected on the basis of the bank balance they have and their way of dressing. Nevertheless, we often tend to forget that a person is not judged by the way he dresses or the way he looks. In today’s world a person is evaluated by taking the exteriors of the person into consideration rather than his interior i.e., his heart and his nature. Now a days, even children going to school, where they learn morals and discipline hardly show so much respect towards their elders. However, a small illiterate kid had by his everyday experience of life had learnt to respect elders and talk politely with them.

YELLOW JOURNALISM

2006-09-25T01:53:00.000-07:00

Sabse tez”- latest news from India,24 ghante 24 reporter,24/7 India news- this is what every news channels claim to broadcast.
Around n numbers of news channels watching every patch of area in the world round the clock. Any news creating sensation anywhere in the world is brought to us by these news channels in less than 30 minutes of the incident taken place.
Now a day we are connected to people living at any latitude or longitude on this earth just by a click of our television remote. Earlier people had to constrain themselves to watching a single news channel of a national level and that to for limited hours of the day. But at present, people can switch on to almost a dozen or more news channels, be it national,international,domestic. Local news channels with news reporters presenting news in the local language has become a very common thing now.
24 hours news channel is turning out to be a full fledged business. Every year almost 2-3 new news channels are launched claiming themselves to be the best and advanced than the others.
But due to this growing competition between so many news channels, the quality of news is slowly deteriorating. Earlier, events such as political speeches,meetings,international agendas, events creating social awareness, government policies etc. where conveyed through news channels. But now a days, events taking part in any remotest area which happen to influence only a few individuals of the society and which are far too irrelevant and unimportant become hard core breaking news.
India being a democratic country has constitutionally given every citizen or organization of Indian origin the right to express their feelings on a large platform using media. But these so called awareness creating news channel are misusing their biggest asset running behind competition and greed to be the best or the No.1.
For instance, news channel showing news on ban of A movies on television, highlighting their bad impact on children themselves tend to forget that while broadcasting such special issues, they themselves show vulgar or offensive clippings. Moreover such 1 hour special programmes are repeated the other day too.
Every news channel has a 1 hour special programme dedicated to Crime.
But while broadcasting such episodes they show rape,murder,theft,slaughter scenes. They forget to take into consideration the threatening impact on the citizens caused by televising such unnerving scenes. They might create awareness among the citizens, but showing such unhealthy scenes might also trigger the minds of the individuals causing psychological disorders, mental trauma etc.
People attempting suicides are captured ‘Live’ on TV by the channels, but no news channel reporter or cameramen present at that place takes the initiative to save him from committing such a blunder. They watch heartlessly every single move of the person till he looses his last breath in order to not to miss any single bit of the so called Breaking News of the day. And at the end of such an adventurous day they blame the Police or Government for not preventing him from doing so. They themselves forget their duties of being responsible citizens, running behind capturing such so called ‘epoch making’ news so that the TRPs of their channels increase.
An 80 year old villager getting married to a 17 year old girl becomes the NEWS OF THE DAY which is telecasted for almost 4-5 hours of the day. The repeat telecast taking another 3 hours of the left 19 hours. A prominent politician’s son or daughter’s marriage is broadcasted live from sangeet to mehndi to the D day showing every minutest details as to what dinner is served, the guest list, which colour dress the bride and the bridegroom would wear, where would they go for honey moon etc. Such irrational news sidelines the political or international issues.
This irrelevant and apathetic information should be stopped from being screened. A code of conduct or a rule book should be brought into action where rules and regulations of the form of news, duration of the news to be presented, depth upto which the reporter should go to get the necessary information can be decided.
Moreover, the news channel should be active just for 14-15 hours a day, so that they give maximum importance and exposure to social,political,economic issues.
The modi operandi of the news channels should be changed completely giving them a new touch, so that more weight is given to the people, their feelings and their development.
The problems faced by the people living in the remotest areas should be brought out in public so that the concerned authorities take the essential steps in solving the problems. Moreover the channels should keep a track of the progress taking place in that direction. Career counseling programmes should also be given more magnitude for the betterment of the future generation.
Documentaries or programmes showing success stories of prominent personalities or great leaders should be aired so that the future generation gets educated and cognizant of our past. As news channels are watched by every family member such 1 hour programmes can turn out to be a hit. Such contents should be shown which all family members could be able to see without feeling tongue-tied. News channel if take appropriate steps in the interests of the society can create a lot of awareness in the society making the future as well as the present generation responsible, indirectly leading India to a developed country. News channels having a lot of potential in them if used in a proper and responsible manner can change the position of India on the global chart. As per the old saying “PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN SWORD”, these news channels can go on the same path and bring about a better and mightier India.